Giving Up On You

Hi.
Alhamdulillah I am feeling well, & thanks to God I still have the strength to stand & going through everything that I had been going through. I have lots of cuts & bruises, and some of them already healed, & while some still taking time, I just don't have the answer why it needs more time than the others. Perhaps it is trying to teach me something.

Right now I can feel my heart is beating in my chest because of many reasons. One of it is because I'm counting my days, its not a big one but since its gonna be my first time so I'm kinda excited & sorta terrified something may hit the hyper times of mine that I'm feeling right now. It already happens, but you see, I have sacrifice so many good times because of this & thats why today, I'm writing this to tell you I'm not gonna let it steal my good times again.

I know that if the person find this page he will read this, & when I found you on facebook yesterday I knew God is giving me the signs. He keeps giving me that signs & I used to lose my control on it, but no, not this time.pls. To spare you a space in my heart just to hate you is not worth it. to be angry with you is just a waste of my time.my heart is not for hatred, it is only enable for the functions to love, & to be loved.

I already give all of me to save this situation, I tried the good ways as well as the bad ways, but it seems you never get it. I'm sorry if we had to get to know each other like this, I think if you not do things that I wish you never did it in the first place,we are gonna be a good friends. because it is not my nature to hate people suka-suka hati without giving a one shot to myself to try to not hate you.

Only Allah knows when both of you are gonna stop doing this. Only Allah knows when my heart will be opened to forgive you. I'm not a psycho, I'm just an ordinary person who don't like people do the things that I don't like to me. I leave it to God to decide whats the best, but until then, please.you know what you did.& you know what you have to do to make it right.